The art of Apology

  

We normal want our kids to be of their best behavior, especially when

they`re sharing or even playing with other kids.

The best way to teach our children the art of apologizing is to practice it. We as parent should be the first one to apologize when we have overreacted due to stress or frustrations.

Our children will learn that nobody is perfect and anybody can make mistakes and importance of apologizing after realizing you have made a mistake.

First we should make sure that children have realizing that they have made a mistake before asking them to apologizing, example I am sorry I didn't brush my shoes, I am sorry I didn't do what I was asked to do.

After apologize then forgiveness follows. After they have known a genuine and sincerely apology they need to know forgiveness as well. We should not remind them they mistake every day.

Since they already realize they are mistake and ask for forgiveness.

If they still don’t know we need to correct them through walking with them through the scenario.

Most of the times kids learn by doing so to make sure they meant when they apologize we must make sure they clean their mess they made or creating something to a friend they hurt.

Sometime children can be too upset to apologizing allowing sometime to cool off and apologizing later this will help them to gain some personal perspectives to be able to deliver a sincere and genuine apology later. If they keep on doing the same thing over and over that means their apology has lost meaning and sincerity. Then we should make sure they are changing their behavior.

                  ****Our kids should know  how and why they are apologizing**

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                                      Tanzania kids

Teaching our kids little responsibilities

Your cousin has a three years old who put her plates in the sink when she finished eating, no reminder needed. Where did all of these wonders children come from?

Responsibility isn’t just completing a task. Its include attitude, the idea of taking action and being proud of doing it not just always having us  parents do it for them.

The whole process of responsibility will not happen in a day but it has to be a long and ongoing process in our families until it becomes a habit.

We can`t suddenly spring responsibility on children and expect they will know how to follow through it takes some time.

We need to show our children  how to do little things  explain how they can complete small tasks like instead of throwing the dirty clothes on the flow put something to store dirty clothes in the house and show her where the dirty clothes belong.

Kids love to help, let them participate in small things in the house show them that your very proud of what they are doing .They will develop the sense of ownership for any repeated action.

When we ask them to do things  like brushing their shoes still it won’t be at your expectation but we should not criticize them, instead we should congratulate them and next time show them how to do it better.

We should not reward them for learning responsibilities instead we should set a routine with a positive end result example they should brush their teeth before watching TV.

Also learning to take care of thinks  help children to develop a sense of responsibility of their action like cleaning up and put together their toys after playing the more we enforce the rules the more they will clean up without being asked.

****Teaching kids about responsibility isn’t easy, it takes years and lot of practises buts since we want to raise better and responsible children who will grow up and become  responsible adults we will keep on training them till we get the result we want****

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PROTECTING OUR CHILDREN

Bullying incidents are no longer limited to the places where our children play and go to study, it’s now everywhere! Children should be taught to be tolerant to one another no matter how old they are; so they learn from a young age to be in peace with one another, therefore discourage bullying.

Children can take pictures or videos or talk about other children and allowing friends and strangers to pass judgments, sometimes in a cruelest of ways. While doing that, children think it’s funny without thinking through the consequences of the feelings of the other child. They may not even define what they are doing as a form of bullying.

As parents we need not to assume; don't assume that your children will never participate in bullying or they won’t dream of joining others who are doing that to other children.

Communicate a lot; we must have regular conversations with our children especially explaining about the consequences of bullying to other children.

Don’t give up and say kids will always be kids; most parents of a child who is engaged in bullying think that it will teach them to toughen up or that their child was just horsing around. This thinking is dangerous to our children; we should take more responsibility and control.

Don’t ignore the technology because you don't understand; technology can be difficulty; yes, but we should not take as an excuse not to know what our children are using technology for. The point is, children are several steps ahead when it comes to technology and social media, so it’s up to you to use it or you be on their heels in order you understand what they are doing.

When our children have been in target with bullying; we need to approach them immediately, as your child may shut down, feel embarrassed or say they can handle it but it’s imperative that we stay involved till there are resolutions.

First we need to discuss with our children while remaining calm. Children often don't divulge bullying because parents tend to over react. The thought of their parent talking to other children`s parent terrifying them so they choose to remain quite. At this time we need to respond to our children without judgment, blame or even attempting to fix it for them.

Also we need to ask our children if they have retaliated in a any way; this is very important to discuss with them, while tempting will land them in as much trouble as the perpetrator so encourage complete transparency of their actions during this time.

****If your friend`s kid can be bulled even your kid can be bulled we should stand up as one and protecting our children against bullying****

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Tanzania Kids

MJENGEE MTOTO WAKO HALI YA KUJIAMINI…

 

Kujiamini ni kama silaha ya mtoto dhidi ya changamoto za dunia. Watoto wanao jiamini  hujisikia vizuri. Mara nyingi huwa na  furaha na kufurahia maisha.

Kwa upande mwingine, watoto wasiojiamini wanapata changamoto nyingi; kubwa zaidi ni kuwa na wasiwasi mara kwa mara.

Mtoto ambaye ana  furaha na anafanya vizuri  katika masomo na michezo  lakini hapati upendo hali hii inapunguza uwezo wake wa kujiamini.

Mara baada ya watoto kufikia utu uzima, ni vigumu kufanya mabadiliko ya kitabia yanayochangia kujiamini kwao; woga huendelea kujengeka hivyo kushindwa kujiamini .

Tuwape moyo watoto katika kujaribu, wakishindwa, kujaribu tena, wajaribu tena, na hatimaye kufanikiwa; hivyo wao wenyewe wataanza kufahamu kuhusu uwezo wao.

Wazazi, walezi , walimu na jamii kwa ujumla wanaweza kukuza uwezo wa kujiamini kwa watoto kwa kuwapa moyo.Kuepuka kulenga eneo moja maalum, kwa mfano, mafanikio katika mtihani; ambayo yanaweza kusababisha watoto kuwa na hisia kwamba wao ni  muhimu tu kama  watafaulu mitihani.

Jinsi wazazi  Wanavyoweza kutoa msaada kwa watoto

Jinsi gani wazazi wanaweza kutoa msaada wa kukuza afya, kujithamini na kujiamini kwa mtoto?

• Kuwa makini nini wanasema kwa watoto wao

 Kumbuka kuwasifu mtoto wako si tu kwa kazi nzuri, lakini pia kwa juhudi

• Kuwa mfano wa kuigwa

• Kuwa na hiari na upendo

Upendo wako utasaidia kuongeza kujithamini kwa mtoto wako. Kuwakumbatia watoto na kuwaambia watoto unawapenda kunasaidia kuweka juhudi kuelekea kitu au kujaribu kitu ambacho  awali alishindwa.

• Kutoa  maoni sahihi

Hii itafanya watoto kujenga  uthubutu.Pia inaonyesha unatambua hisia ya mtoto na kumpa moyo kufanya uchaguzi sahihi tena wakati mwingine.

• Kujenga usalama na upendo kwenye mazingira ya nyumbani

Watoto ambao hawana  usalama au wananyanyaswa nyumbani hushindwa  kujiamini.

• Kuwasaidia watoto kuwa kutumia uzoefu uliopita kufanikisha shughuli mpya kwa kujiamini

Tanzania Kids